. . . They point out that such knives, which are readily available in most kitchens, can inflict a lot of damage and are used in almost half of all reported stabbings. Furthermore, chefs they've consulted say these knives "have little practical value" (except, apparently, for puncturing someone who's royally pissed you off). OK, point taken (pun intended) . . . but why stop there!? I suggest eliminating all kitchen utensils except for the spork! A spork is all any law abiding, peace loving citizen ought to need. And while we're at it, why not do away with many dangerous garden implements too . . . starting with chain saws (which can leave nasty, gaping wounds and severed limbs).
For the good of the human race, especially the children, we need more government regulation and we need it NOW. Save us, oh Mother Government, from sharp and pointy objects . . . and from ourselves!
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